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玛丽莲梦露与她未曾写完的诗


2020-07-24

玛丽莲梦露与她未曾写完的诗
 

"The truth can only be recalled, never invented."

「真相只能忆起,不能被创造。」

  当我们提到玛丽莲梦露(Marilyn Monroe)时,不外乎是与性感迷人、流行标誌或八卦绯闻这些印象连结在一起;而鲜少有人知道,她其实非常热衷于文学和写作。

  玛丽莲梦露对文学并非三分钟热度,而是坚持不懈地热爱。她的个人藏书至少就有四百本,书单里除了陀思妥耶夫斯基和约翰‧密尔顿(John Milton)的经典着作,也不乏海明威和杰克‧鲁亚克的当代文学作品。当没有拍摄行程的时候,梦露还会去加州大学洛杉矶分校(UCLA)的夜间班攻读文学和历史课程。然而,梦露标誌性的公众形象「性感活泼的金髮女郎」长存于世界,这和引领她走向生命尽头的内心世界,形成了鲜明强烈的对比。

  她将零碎和诗词般的文字,潦草地涂写在笔记本和活页纸上,成为一张张私密诗作;距梦露辞世的近半世纪后,出版商整里集结她未曾发表过的诗、笔记和书信,出版了《Fragments: Poems, Intimate Notes, Letters》一书。该书揭露了梦露複杂又感性的一面,她深深凝视着自己内心,同时热切地思想关于他人和世界。而字里行间揭示的重点,就是梦露人尽皆知的公众形象,与其背后脆弱不堪的私人生活之间的悲剧性疏离:她被这个世界误解,渴望能被真实地看见。

  温柔细腻、痛苦而深邃的文字,暗示出梦露最后一任丈夫亚瑟‧米勒曾说过的话:「她具备诗人应有的直觉和本能反应,但她缺乏约束。」

玛丽莲梦露与她未曾写完的诗

Only parts of us will ever

从来都只有局部的我们
touch only parts of others —

触动到部分的他人
one’s own truth is just that really — one’s own truth.

自身持守的真相终究是 — 自我的真理罢了
We can only share the part that is understood by within another’s knowing acceptable to

我们只能分享他人所接受的部分
the other — therefore so one

因此个体的绝大部分
is for most part alone.

是孤独的存在
As it is meant to be in

这意味着
evidently in nature — at best though perhaps it could make

显然地天性 — 最多也许是
our understanding seek

让我们得以理解
another’s loneliness out.

寻见他人的孤寂

玛丽莲梦露与她未曾写完的诗

Life —
I am of both of your directions
Life
Somehow remaining hanging downward
the most
but strong as a cobweb in the
wind — I exist more with the cold glistening frost.
But my beaded rays have the colors I’ve
seen in a paintings — ah life they
have cheated you

玛丽莲梦露与她未曾写完的诗

Oh damn I wish that I were
dead — absolutely nonexistent —
gone away from here — from
everywhere but how would I do it
There is always bridges — the Brooklyn
bridge — no not the Brooklyn Bridge
because But I love that bridge (everything is beautiful from there and the air is so clean) walking it seems
peaceful there even with all those
cars going crazy underneath. So
it would have to be some other bridge
an ugly one and with no view — except
I particularly like in particular all bridges — there’s some-
thing about them and besides these I’ve
never seen an ugly bridge

玛丽莲梦露与她未曾写完的诗

feel what I feel
within myself — that is trying to
become aware of it
also what I feel in others
not being ashamed of my feeling, thoughts — or ideas

realize the thing that
they are —

玛丽莲梦露与她未曾写完的诗

I’m finding that sincerity
and trying to be as simple or direct as (possible) I’d like
is often taken for sheer stupidity
but since it is not a sincere world —
it’s very probable that being sincere is stupid.
One probably is stupid to
be sincere since it’s in this world
and no other world that we know
for sure we exist — meaning that —
(since reality exists it should be must be dealt should be met and dealt with)
since there is reality to deal with

玛丽莲梦露与她未曾写完的诗

I guess I have always been
deeply terrified at to really be someone’s
wife
since I know from life
one cannot love another,
ever, really

玛丽莲梦露与她未曾写完的诗

for life
It is rather a determination not to be overwhelmed

for work
The truth can only be recalled, never invented

书籍资讯:

书名:《Fragments: Poems, Intimate Notes, Letters》

作者:玛丽莲梦露(Marilyn Monroe)

出版:Farrar, Straus and Giroux

时间:2010

参考报导:Brain Pickings

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